Day 5 and some afterthoughts

This day was awful. My calories were so depleted and I was so exhausted from my lack of sleep that I was about ready to crack. In my first class, my professor wouldn't let me eat because he was allergic to peanut butter (I was eating peanut butter and crackers). In my second class I was falling asleep, and I snapped at a kid who said that the people sleeping in the shanty town didn't have it that hard. After that class, at 2 - 2 hours before I would be allowed to eat - I came home to my roommates eating Five Guys. I got upset, and they mocked me. I had to retreat to our bathroom to escape the aroma of the burgers. my last class was rotten - I was upset at my roommates on top of being cranky, and so hungry I was about to cry. I got back to an empty apartment at 4, couldn't find my burger, and burst into tears. When I found it, cold and unpleasant in the fridge, I wasn't even happy about eating it as I usually am. I was just ravenous. I quickly showered and went to work. It took me about 2 hours before the calories from the Five Guys set in and I stopped being cranky.

The rest of the weekend revolved around me getting food. I'm still extremely tired and catching up on my eating. Despite the lack of realism of this assignment, I gained quite a bit of insight into the hardships of impoverished people. I anticipated the discomfort of being unhygenic, and wasn't too surprised by the bugs. Also, based on the type of food I was eating (mostly inexpensive vegetables and peanut butter and crackers which I was rationing) I am now painfully aware of what it means when text books and articles talk about people who receive a lower-than-optimal amount of calories. That, combined with the lack of sleep, made me far less productive than I would have been otherwise.

I was surprised by how disdainful people were toward the assignment, and how they still seemed to judge me as some hippie freak even after I explained everything to them. I was also incredibly disheartened by the lack of support from people close to me. Although I chose to do this assignment and stick to the rules, that didn't make it any less hard. I needed sympathy, or passivity at the very least (I'm making that a word). Instead, I was mocked. Usually I have a sense of humor about it... but based on the circumstances, that behavior lead me to redraw my assessments of the character of those individuals.

On a brighter note, Katie and I did very well by coordinating our funds. We were able to buy toothpaste and toothbrushes, and shared the effort of making food. Also we had quite a bit of luck, as we came upon food at the speaking center on Wednesday. Also, despite how hard actual sleeping was, the shantytown was a lot of fun.

I will end with a story from the Sunday after the project. A coworker came into Starbucks during my shift and told me she read about me in the paper, and that I was quoted. I asked what I'd said, and she replied "I feel dirty, but that's OK." I spent the rest of the day very concerned, only to discover that she had misquoted the article. I was actually reported to have said "I feel gross, but I'm fine with that." I'm much more comfortable with the reality - what a silly matter of semantics!